I spent a few month working at home as a phone sex operator! What I learned was that talking dirty was more important then I thought. Men wanted women to talk dirty to them, because it makes them feel desired and sexually wanted. These men were climaxing for me quicker over the phone with what I was saying to them then they would have if I had touched them. These men had wives and girlfriends at home yet they were still calling me!? why? Because they weren’t getting the additional stimulus at home. Now, these men loved their partners and did not want to cheat on them, but they felt unwanted or stuck in a sexual routine so they set on calling me.
These men loved, fantasies, role play, descriptions, and lots of details. They wanted the women to be spontaneous and sometimes initiate because they, like women, also wanted to feel sexually desired. It gave them confidence and self worth. After seeing how these men craved words of affirmation from their partners in bed I knew it must of been an important factor for them the same way affection and romance was an important factor for me in bed. Seeing how wild these men got over the phone gave me the idea to try it in my personal life.
The first night with my husband Cole I decided to give it a try but I froze, got nervous, and lost my words. I thought I would just trying saying what I would say over the phone, but it wasn’t genuine and he could tell. Plus, it came out more rehearsed and uncomfortable then I thought it would. So I decided to try taking it slow and build up to it. I started by saying what I was already thinking…just out loud this time. Once I started doing that it came out of me quick and natural.
I started by telling him how good he felt and how I loved when he touched me. I then decided to get more descriptive as I had learned over the phone. During intercourse I would tell him that I missed him and I had been wanting to fuck him all day. I would tell him how excited I got and ask him to feel how wet I was for him. I would let him know how good he felt, how big he felt, or how soft his skin felt sliding against my tongue. I would even randomly text him fantasies I had of us during the day while he was at work. I would also surprise him with a sexy outfit about once a week and initiate the whole thing. Its safe to say that not only our relationship but, our sex life has improved dramatically!
He seemed happier, more excited, confident, and was more affectionate and romantic with me. He claimed that he never knew how much I wanted him. I assumed he knew although how could he if I never vocally stated it. Men need to hear it. Women go off emotions and feelings. We as women need to “feel” loved, wanted, and sexy. Men need to be shown it. Men are typically not as emotionally aware as women are so we need to show them, tell them, and remind them every now and then.
Our sex life has gone from 4 times a week to 8. Now that he feels more confident, loved, and overall happier, he has become more affectionate towards me. Rather then him coming home to watch tv he wants to spend time with me, surprise me with romantic outings, and do some of the household errands so that I don’t have to. He claims he wants to make me feel as loved as I make him feel. I can honestly say I have never felt so loved and wanted. Our relationship is now full of passion and intensity. We have both learned to be more giving, thoughtful, considerate, and loving. It feels like were new to each other dating all over again. I know people say a happy wife is a happy life, but in reality if the husband is not happy how is he supposed to have the motivation or fuel to make his wife happy. In relationships you really do get what you give. Without having been a phone sex operator I don’t think I would have ever learned just how important words of affirmation were to a man. I had no idea that talking dirty would have such an affect on my marriage outside of sex, but it did and for this I am am forever grateful! Talking dirty has not only improved my marriage overall, but it has made my husband a happier more confident man and that to me was worth it alone.